February 2012
nuditea:
“when one door closes, another one opens”
imagine how annoying it would be if that were true
you close the bathroom door to pee and your front door suddenly blows open
your cat escapes
you run out and jump into the car to chase the cat and hear everything falling out of your over-stuffed pantry as its door unlatches
mjolkk:
oh my god i’m at the grocery store and there is a guy in the frozen section who is tweaked off his balls on some kind hallucinatory drug.
i’m in the next isle meowing softly through the cereal boxes where he can’t see me and he is losing his shit pulling pizza boxes out of the freezers and yelling that he needs to save the popsicle cat
am i a bad person
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A Collection of Rare and Obscure Words
Cheiloproclitic - Being attracted to someones lips. Quidnunc - One who always has to know what is going on. Ultracrepidarian - Of one who speaks or offers opinions on matters beyond their knowledge. Apodyopis - The act of mentally undressing someone. Gymnophoria - The sensation that someone is mentally undressing you. Tarantism - The urge to overcome...
farisbueller:
felicefawn:
The fact that the majority of teenagers would rather listen to Justin Bieber or Taylor Momsen over Jimi Hendrix or Pink Floyd makes me want to fucking kill myself. Literally.
up next on MTV’s “White Girl Problems”: special snowflake and part-time tumblr user felicefawn is literally contemplating suicide over people having different music taste than her and thinks...
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the-eleventh-blog:
Who needs romantic comedies when you have the British Government
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randompandemonium:
ALLOW ME TO PLAY YOU THE SONG...
teacher: so what'd you do this weekend
me: i travelled
teacher: where
me: everywhere
me: would you like directions to the nearest airport in mumbai i can get you there
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adamusprime:
i was over at my grandparents’ house and i was talking to my pretty senile granddad about the internet because he asked
and he was like “so you have thousands of young people reading what you write?”
and i asked them if there is anything he would like to tell them
so here is irvin robertson’s advice to the youthful masses:
“when you decide what to do with your life, the most...
